Sep 9, 2016

One. Week.

First up, I wanted to say a huge THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart, for those that reached out with comments, questions, love, thoughts, name it, from my last post. We will get through my dad's hurdle just like we have gotten through all the other hurdles this year.

I'm not going to lie, between three rounds of IVF, endless insurance coordination, hundreds of shots, our cat's broken jaw, financial troubles and my dad's cancer and depression, this year has been trying.

Topping off my filled-to-the-brim-cup, with the fact that I currently have four estrogen patches slapped on my thigh....which is finally rearing those fun hormones everyone keeps talking about.
I have already ugly-cried twice since upping the patches.
Hold on to your tray tables, this is going to be a bumpy emotional ride in the very near future.

I promise though...I am doing okay. WE are doing okay.

BECAUSE....we are in the FINAL. COUNTDOWN.

Sing it with me now....

My emotions are all over the place. Happy, nervous, anxious, emotional, frustrated at times (we'll get into that in a bit) but mostly....

I had another monitoring appointment this morning.
They checked my lining. It's still hovering at 9.5mm.
My estrogen levels were a tad lower last week so I'm hoping they are more in line today once I receive the official call-back.

My patches have been upped from 2 every two days, to 4 every two days, and they will hover at that number for the foreseeable future.

So here's a recap:

Things I'm nervous about....I start progesterone in oil (PIO) shots Sunday night. Shots are shots are shots, but THESE shots are BIG. And they go in my upper ass cheek. And I need to figure out how to do them myself. And if this all works out, I'll be doing them nightly for 8-10 weeks. Super.

I had the nurse give me targets on my ass at today's appointment. Marked with a sharpie, my ass officially looks like a chubby blank-faced person staring wide-eyed into the distance.

Otherwise, I am really not nervous, per se, about the transfer. I am just chugging along counting down the days. Knowing I will be happy as a clam on Valium for the big event eases my mind about, well, mostly everything, to be honest.

Things I'm frustrated about....our insurance. Remember when I thought we would be submitting our huge ass genetic testing bill to the insurance and they would waive their magic wand and reimburse me?

Yea....not so much.

Turns out, the lab we are using will most likely be considered out of network, as they don't contract with insurances and have no National Provider Number. We have no idea what we will be reimbursed with, if anything.

It started out with a total processing time of 30 days, and now it's 45 days after the first 3 weeks of collecting information, so maybe, just maybe we'll see a check in October?

And then the amount. Well, since it's out of network there are a couple other variables.

1. Out of network typically only covers 50% of billable procedures.

2. But 50% of what, you may ask? It's not 50% of what I paid....of course not. It's 50% of whatever the national average is for this type of testing. Which I have no idea.

We'll see what happens. I have been BEYOND frustrated at this point, so am trying to come to peace with the notion that we just paid $12k for a baby and be done with it.

(And yes, I am still fully aware this is far less than what other people pay for IVF, but I didn't anticipate it. I had no back-up plan. This was all kind of out of pocket, and well...let's not compare, ok? I'm stressed out enough about it already.)

Things I'm excited about.....duh...GETTING PREGNANT!

Also, Saturday is my LAST abdomen injection!! WOO fucking HOO!

Things I'm looking forward to.....closing the IVF chapter. Good riddance.

Things I'm not looking forward to.....not drinking. Let's be honest, I like a good cocktail. I'm sure I'll find comfort after a stressful day in other ways, but red wine by a fire in the dead of winter can't be beat.

Also, I'm sure I won't be jealous AT ALL for being husband's DD for the next 9ish months.
that was sarcasm.

We'll get through it. :) I'll be busy renovating a nursery anyways. :)

So that's my recap. The next time I am at a fertility clinic I will be GETTING PREGNANT!

Thanks for reading!! Happy weekend! XO


  1. I can't even imagine sticking myself with a massive needle for months :(

    The not drinking part seriously sucks. Especially when, if Mark is anything like Mike, they could care less. Ha. I thought 'oh, maybe he'll cut back to make me feel a little better.' NOPE - HA! Oh well, like you said all worth it. And who knows you may be like me - I would occasionally go to have a 1/2 glass of wine or so and it tasted AWFUL. Like my body knew, no girl, you shouldn't be drinking that ;)

  2. Wow . . . lots of stuff happening very soon! Praying for the best for you!

  3. As always --- thinking of you. you are one strong ass woman.

  4. I am just so excited and so nervous for you. I love how life throws you guys a bunch of shit and you just handle it. Because it's how life has been for us too. And one else our age that I know in person. I'm thinking of you and praying for you and all the other things.